Today's quiz

1) Have you ever had to root around for a substitute baking pan because access to the one you really want is impeded by a mousetrap? a) Mistah, yo singin' to the choir! b)Let me ask Manfredo, our day chef c) Please don't talk to me again

2) You have poured two bottles of Nuclear Drano into your bathroom sink, attacked it with a plunger (in clear violation of label directions and, possibly, federal law), and even resorted to the snake. There's not so much as a gurgle, and now there's a foamy mass of Drano sitting in the sink. You: a) Call a plumber and enjoy a good "norge" joke for only $120 b) Consider whether a propane torch would bring anything to the party c) Explain to the checkout girl at the Rite-Aid that, indeed, Drano plus Haagen-Dazs does equal "partay!"

3) The entire house has been sick in shifts for days. The dishes have spread well beyond the kitchen, the only potential for a meal involves stretching your supply of chicken nuggets, and you are nearly out of garbage bags. The first adult to return to health should: a) Help watch "Survivor: Vanuatu" b) Take another shot at the goddamned sink c) Post a blog entry